Southern California is home to some of the highest divorce rates in the country. Between the counties of San Diego, Los Angeles and Orange Counties, the southern portion of the state has much higher rates of divorce than the national average. 

A result of this higher than average divorce rate, there are many family law attorneys in Southern California that specialize in divorce and divorce mediation. In the event that the divorce is amicable, the steps below can help assist and facilitate the divorce process. 

 

1. Opt for an Uncontested Divorce – If possible, it is best to go the uncontested divorce route. Contested divorces cost  on average $15,000. Compare that amount to an uncontested divorce that can cost as little as $500 for filing fees.

The more major points that you and your soon to be former spouse agree upon, the easier the divorce will be. If the two parties agree on child support (if applicable), child custody, spousal support and terms of the divorce then the less money the parties will have to spend. Relative to a contested divorce, uncontested divorces can greatly reduce court and lawyer costs along with financial and emotional stress. 

Uncontested divorces can expedite the divorce process and leave more money in your pockets. Uncontested divorces also require less stress. As hard as the process may be, it is advantageous to iron out all of the commonalities and agreements. The less issues of contention, the more money in your pocket.  

2.Don’t Speak Ill of Your Former Spouse – I know this may be a difficult one for many to understand and properly implement and apply, but it is imperative to focus on the facts and speak either neutral or positively with regards to your former spouse

This can help alleviate negative feelings and connotations towards the soon to be ex-spouse. By speaking calmly and focusing on the facts at hand can help make the divorce a little bit easier. If the divorce has gotten to a messy stage, simply refuse to comment about it with friends or family members. If needed, consult with a divorce coach, divorce mediation attorney or therapist. 

3.Forgive & Move Forward – Another example of “easier said than done”, however this practice can really aid any grief stricken individual to propel themselves into the next stage of their life. Many self help books are available for those interested in moving forward. 

By implementing mindful and self-help resources in your repertoire like the book The Four Agreements or consulting with a divorce professional, you can see that the healing process is much more feasible and easier to obtain.

4.Avoid Litigation if Possible –  This is a big one. Litigation can cause both unnecessary financial and mental stress. If possible, and the divorce is amicable, it is best to avoid litigation. Litigation is what the masses of people tend to think of when they hear of lawyers. Litigation occurs in a courtroom and the entire process leading up to the event can be incredibly expensive. 

If the divorce is amicable, much of the matters can be resolved by a divorce mediation attorney. Divorce mediators specialize in negotiation tactics and are experienced in the legal matters required to mediate.